Community and Family

thoughts on how we fit into the web of community, family and society

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    Human Size in Relative Space and Time

    My friend Dan just posted an insightful piece about the sweetly humbling (without diminishing) perspective on the single life or the whole collective human being in the context of the whole universe.  It resonated with the passage I had read for group practice last Wednesday from Ramesh Menon’s rendering of the Shiva Puranas, which talks about all the units of time from a nimesha, a human moment, to the life of the highest Siva principle–an immensity of infinite time that is incomprehensible at a human consciousness level.

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    The truly pro-life would support basic gynecological care for poor women (I Stand With Planned Parenthood)

    Almost none of the services provided by Planned Parenthood are abortions.  Rather, they provide much needed health care to women in underserved communities.  Please stand with Planned Parenthood today:

    Planned Parenthood

    Dear Elizabeth,

    Minutes ago, the U.S. House of Representatives voted to bar Planned Parenthood from all federal funding for any purpose whatsoever. That means no funding to Planned Parenthood health centers for birth control, lifesaving cancer screenings, HIV testing, and other essential care.

    By far, this is the most dangerous legislative assault on women’s health in our history, and it cannot go unanswered. We need you to stand united with us now. We need you to stand with Planned Parenthood and with the three million women, men, and teens we serve, who are now at risk of losing access to basic care.

    We’ve drafted an open letter to every single representative in the House who voted for this cruel, unconscionable, unthinkable bill, and to every senator who still has a chance to stop it. Will you sign it — and share it right now?


    AN OPEN LETTER TO CONGRESS


    To the members of the House of Representatives who voted for the Pence Amendment to H.R. 1:
    How could you?

    How could you betray millions of women — and men, and teens — who rely on Planned Parenthood for basic health care?

    How could you condemn countless women in this country to undiagnosed cancer, unintended pregnancies, and untreated illnesses?

    Your vote was not only against those who seek care at Planned Parenthood health centers, but against every one of us who has ever sought care there, and against every one of us who knows that when we are healthy, when we are in charge of our lives, we thrive.

    It was a vote against me.

    To every senator who will soon consider this legislation:
    I stand with Planned Parenthood to say to you: STOP THIS.

    I stand with Planned Parenthood and the hundreds of thousands of people from every walk of life and every corner of this country who join me in signing this letter to tell you that we will fight this bill and we expect you to do the same.

    I stand with and for the millions of women, men, and teens who rely on Planned Parenthood, and I expect you to do the same.

    To every member of Congress, know that we stand together today against this outrageous assault, and together we will not lose.
    Sign The Letter
    Elizabeth, this fight will continue next week when our legislators return to their home districts, and when the vote heads to the U.S. Senate the following week. Your voice, your strength, and your unwavering support are absolutely critical, now and in the weeks ahead. I am so glad to know you are with us during this very challenging time.
    Sincerely,


    Cecile Richards, President
    Planned Parenthood Federation of America

    P.S. Thank you also for your patience as these ongoing threats to Planned Parenthood require us to communicate with you so frequently.
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    The Birds Were Chattering Madly Excited

    This bush was full of tufted titmice and sparrows. They were all simultaneously chirping with excitement.

    I imagined some of them agitated and anxiously saying of the unseasonable warmth hat it was not normal and something needed to be done.

    The rest of them were loud drunks on the spring warmth. “Life is short. Enjoy what has come.”

    Perhaps there was one truly wise bird who was saying that both of those are true and that recognizing both truths was a door to harmony.

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    Talking About the Wisdom Goddesses (and February Willow Street Book Club)

    I am looking forward to February’s meeting of the Willow Street Book Club this coming Sunday, where we will be discussing David Frawley’s, Spiritual Secrets of Ayurveda:  Tantric Yoga and the Wisdom Goddess. Especially since many of us will likely have been to hear some or all of Professor Douglas Brooks’ discussion of the great goddesses last weekend, the meeting promises to be full of lively, thoughtful, and insight-provoking discussion.

    One of the things I have been pondering on this latest read is how I can fully imbibe the wisdom that is offered with the imagery and stories of the goddesses, without getting caught up in being troubled from a feminist perspective.  Many yoga practitioners I know rely on the call in the texts to worship the “goddess” as a way of saying that women are not diminished in the classic texts.  My conundrum is that when one looks at the texts and the images about the goddesses, all the stereo-typical notions of beauty and youth are inextricably intertwined.  Like the Western fairy tales I gobbled up in my youth and their entrancing but insidiously prejudicial archetypes, the sweet, loving, desirable goddesses are the young and fair; the fierce and powerful goddesses are the ugly crones.


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    Happy Thanksgiving?

    Last night as I waited on the metro platform at Takoma Park after yoga class, a large man in a shabby black coat came up to me and said, “happy thanksgiving.”

    “Happy thanksgiving,” I replied, thinking I like Thanksgiving better than I like Valentine’s Day, even considering the somewhat unsavory roots of both holidays.

    “Oops,” he said, “I meant ‘happy Valentine’s Day; I’ve been getting that wrong all day.”

    “That’s OK,” I said.  “Every day should be a day of thanks giving.”  I had been enjoying the day fully even though I had not engaged in any Hallmark-driven behavior and was feeling fully grateful for my life and not just because of the post-yoga class glow.

    “I don’t have anyone to give red roses to any more,” the man lamented.  “My mother has passed; my grandma has passed.  I don’t have a girl right now.”

    “Your mother and grandma are still here in your heart, and they know you love them.  They do not need roses,”  I offered.  “In fact, you have helped the world be a better place not buying any roses today.  Most bouquets of roses are laden with pesticides and cut and wrapped by women in poor countries who get sick from the pesticides.”  At this, a young woman watching me with commiseration lit up with a big smile.  Who would start giving advice on the hazards of Valentine’s Day flowers — I restrained myself from talking fair trade chocolate — in this situation?

    “You’re nice,” the man said, “what’s your name?”  The metro was still not due for another eight minutes, and, being the introverted, cautious, small, middle-aged woman that I am and thus feeling a little pressured by his longing for someone to talk to, I did the verbal dance to extricate myself from the conversation and get back to the email I had been in the middle of reading.  He went away peaceably, so it was alright.

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    Comfort Food Potluck Red Cabbage and Sprout Salad

    Last night I went to my neighbors’ “comfort food pot luck.” Comfort food tends to mean for many of us in winter warm, dense, heavy, rich food that is likely to be white, beige, or otherwise pale in color. There is much to be said for the emotional impact of great mashed potatoes or macaroni and cheese, especially when it is cold.

    As I was deciding what to bring and remembering that last time I went to this pot luck there were three kinds of macaroni and cheese, mashed potatoes, and multiple kinds of bread, I thought about what would bring me comfort in that context.

    My diet is not subject to any particular label. I mostly do not eat meat or cow dairy–perhaps vegetarian/vegan preferred would be a good label to the extent one would need to give a label (we are so fond of those in this society). I also prefer local and organic food, in that order, when available, and find my health benefits from a fair percentage of my diet being raw, fresh fruit and vegetables.

    Based on my assumptions of what others would likely bring, I thought that it would give me great comfort to have something fresh, bright, crunchy, raw, organic, and mostly local to go with mashed potatoes (they were delicious Marlene) and assorted casseroles. I took a look at what was in the kitchen and found I had red cabbage, a couple of apples, an onion, and some carrots from the farmers’ market; organic celery, raisins, ginger, lemon, apple cider vinegar, and white miso from the food coop and the organic grocery store; and mung beans sprouting on the counter.

    The red cabbage salad and sprout salad was a hit as a foil for the traditional “comfort food.”

    Since you asked, here’s how its made:

    Mince some onion and dice a small red cabbage. Splash some apple cider over the onion and cabbage so it can start pickling while you are cutting up the rest of the ingredients.

    Dice some carrots and celery and add to the cabbage and onions.

    Throw in some raisins.

    Mince some ginger and add to vegetables.

    Mix a couple of tablespoons of mild white/blonde miso and some Dijon mustard to taste (a darker miso will be too strong) and stir in hot water to thin until the miso-mustard mix is a creamy consistency and stir into the vegetables.

    Dice an apple or two and mix in with the other ingredients.

    Add some fresh bean sprouts if you have them (I always have sprouts growing except in the hottest weather; a good source for supplies is www.sproutpeople.org; best to add the sprouts while they are still short so they are the same texture and size of the other ingredients in this chopped salad).

    Squeeze in some lemon juice to taste (or more vinegar if you don’t have a lemon on hand or want to be completely local). If necessary to get the dressing spread evenly over the vegetables, add a little more water.

    Add another apple or additional raisins if you need more sweetness to offset the saltiness of the miso and the astringency of the vinegar and lemon juice.

    This salad benefits from sitting for at least a few hours. It can sit overnight without the apples and the sprouts–the miso starts to ferment the cabbage as for sauerkraut, which is nice– but the apples and sprouts will get mushy and are better added at the end.

    Enjoy. Play with ingredients and quantities and please comment if you come up with a delightful variation.

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    “You Who Choose to Lead Must Follow,” Argentinian Tango, and the Dance of Shiva and Shakti

    On Friday night, Professor Douglas Brooks offered a satsang that was hosted by District Kula. One of the attendees, who said that she did no yoga, but taught Argentinian tango, wanted to know about what she had heard of yoga talking about the dance of masculine and feminine because that’s what tango is all about.

    Douglas gave a quick overview of the idea of the tattvas as a foundation for an answer to the tango dancer’s question. As part of this background, he discussed the numerological aspect of the tattvas, saying that Shiva and Shakti relate like this:  one is two becomes three becomes five. The two must separate, and the space between them makes three and teaches us the one.  Because of the spaces between, we do not have one to two to four, but two (one because inseparable) to three to five.  We know the one only when we know two, and the one is therefore part of three.   (“Lovely dance of numbers; that makes perfect sense,” I thought, having a happy geekfest in my own mind.  “I’ll enjoy pondering how that might be an explanation for there being five top tattvas and not six or four and wondering whether I had even begun finding an understanding, even though what Douglas was talking about is something I have been contemplating for years in various ways and contexts.)

    Douglas then led into a description of the inseparable, inextricably intertwined nature of Shiva and Shakti.  “It is like that in tango,” the dancer interjected at multiple points.  “The better the leader, the more he is listening to the follower, thus allowing the follower to be the leader.”  Each time Douglas refined his response, the dancer offered something else about her experience with tango.  “Right, when they are dancing well, the man takes on some of the characteristics of the feminine, and the woman that of the man.  The difference between them starts to dissolve into the dance itself.”  Her eyes lit up, and she bubbled up with speech, in her excitement at finding in the tantric philosophy what appeared to be an explanation of what she experiences in the tango.

    The tango dancer and the yoga texts assign specific roles and attributes to the masculine and the feminine, and we tend to fall into that tradition when we discuss the tantric philosophy.  As much as the traditional tantrika or tango dancer might say that the masculine and feminine (when embodied) take on/have characteristics of each other, they have assigned masculine/feminine roles to play, and they are still stuck in a paradigm that keeps real humans in assigned roles.  These assigned roles impact how male and female are permitted to act in society, regardless of any recognition that who is actually, rather than technically, in charge may be in flux on different levels.

    The paradigm of tango dancing kept Friday night’s discussion within the context of typical and rigid roles for male and female, but I do not think that is a required way for us to think of how to bring the tantric yoga philosophy into our lives.  When we think of the tattvas as abstract principles, we do not have to privilege in our lives or own thinking the traditional divide between male and female roles as the basis for understanding the play of opposites (though to be true to the text in its historical context we do).

    I believe that the dance of shiva and shakti is as much about the dance between the universal and multiplicitous individuality as it is about the specific play between masculine and feminine in assigned roles.  The one is two.  The two (one) separates into three; when the two separate we discover the one (two), and after that the three becomes five.  I remember a friend saying in our college days, “There are three of us in it:  there is me, there is my loved one, and then there is our relationship.”  To be in the world and relate fully, the tattvas (and dances with partners of either sex) teach us that two are inseparable by being in relationship.  By recognizing the appearance of separation, the dance of Shiva and Shakti tattvas shows us the relationship — the oneness.  Thus, all consciousness is one, but two, and then three, and yet still one.

    How this informs me, other than enjoyable thoughts in my head, is that when we try to be spaciously and openly aware in all of our relationships of this elemental play of individual identity, separability, and indivisible unity, we see the other in ourselves and ourselves in the other.   This helps much to inspire friendliness, understanding, and compassion.  It also helps bring understanding of the leader when we are following, which it makes it easier to follow with discrimination, but without judgment.  When it is our turn to lead, it helps us know that for those who might choose to or be required to follow us for some particular project, that to lead well we must listen to the followers.  As the the Grateful Dead taught me decades ago, “you who choose to lead must follow.”

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    Experimenting with Social Media

    This morning I decided it was time to have a public “Rose Garden Yoga” page on Facebook, in addition to the page under my name.

    Before I even figured out whether I had done it correctly, a couple of friends had hit the “like” button. I still do not know when and where it appeared so that would happen. After browsing around, I did figure out how to “share” with my friends that I had created the page and that brought in a few more. I have also added a widget to the welcome page of the blog/website, so people can “like” “Rose Garden Yoga.” (Please do).

    Did I need to do this? Absolutely not. Do I find knowing my way around these mediums of expression useful? Yes, because they have become so important to how we communicate with each other across generations, the planet, and various social divides. Do I mind that getting it just right or perfectly current takes more time and skill than I have from just experimenting? Not really. When I want to do more, I spend the time to learn or hire someone to help. It is also sort of fun to just mess around and experiment and discover whether I can figure it out just by trusting that if I try enough different things and don’t get frustrated by not getting it “right” right away, I will end up either with something that serves well enough or will decide it is not that important and let go.

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    Warming Up on a Windy Wintry Day (and Warm Organic Ginger Oil Massage Treatment)

    If it had not been for the half off coupon from Green Deals, I might not have gone to Wellbeing Massage in Dupont Circle for an ayurvedically inspired warm organic ginger oil massage after work today.  But I am certainly glad I succumbed to the lure of the coupon.

    It was absolutely perfect on this windy, bitter day in mid-winter to surrender, in a perfectly heated and softly lit room, to having warm oil poured onto my eyebrow center (ajna door) and having it massaged into my scalp, face, and neck and then poured on and slathered all over.  With the quantity of oil used, it is more a treatment than a massage, and and such, an admirable supplement (and never a replacement) for my regular massages with long time Capitol Hill massage therapist and friend Patrick McClintock of House of Hands.  For the first time in weeks, my skin feels completely hydrated, and though my house was set at 59F when I got home two hours after the treatment, I still feel warm.

    If you decide you want to get one of these treatments to chase away winter cold and dryness, please mention my name (shameless solicitation; if five of you go, I get a free treatment).  And if you are looking for a fantastic therapeutic massage from a wonderful person and experienced therapist, give Patrick a call.  And if five of you go to get a massage with him and mention my name, maybe he and I can work out a deal donating a portion of the proceeds to D-CLAW‘s next charity of choice (that’s DC Ladies Arm Wrestling for Charity) (more on D-CLAW in a future post).