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What Made Me Notice?
Yesterday was the first day of the season working in the youth garden at the National Arboretum. Something made me look up. A bald eagle perhaps 40-50 feet overhead before soaring higher. “Look; follow my finger,” I called to my fellow gardeners, pointing to where the great bird was flying. They all looked up, and we shared a moment of awe.
“What made me notice?” one of my companions asked. I could not say exactly. I could have seen it’s shadow or perhaps even, without hearing it well enough to identify the sound, heard the wind in the eagle’s feathers. Or perhaps just instinct.
Would My Life Have Been Different?
The other day I found myself wondering how and whether my life would have been different if at 20 I had been introduced to the writings of Abhinavagupta instead of those of Derrida.
It is always interesting to contemplate “what might have beens,” as long as it does not invite regret or disappointment. I might have continued as a philosopher instead of shifting to law or have practiced yoga with greater intensity earlier on if I had been reading Abhinavagupta instead of Derrida, but who is to know what really could or would have happened if things had been different. We need to act as though we can shift and change, but we must at the same time accept that we are ultimately not in charge.



